Feature:

Kansas City Might Have Won Game, ESPN Thinks

Wednesday, July 21, 2010

BRISTOL, CT -- According to sources on the SportsCenter set early Wednesday morning, ESPN definitely thinks Kansas City won their game against Toronto Tuesday night, maybe. When reached for comment co-anchor Linda Cohn wasn't able to confirm a final score for the game, which had a pretty good chance of being held in either Kansas City or Toronto, but during a phone conversation with football star Michael Vick's agent to confirm Vick's involvement in a recent nightclub shooting, Cohn was able to quickly declare that she's pretty sure she saw somewhere that Kansas City won. "Didn't you hear that Brett Favre is going to give a hint today on whether or not he's returning this season, why are you asking me about some game between Kansas and Toledo?", said co-anchor Neil Everett, hastily going over his notes on the report about Danica Patrick's new GoDaddy.com photo shoot. "Sure, I bet Kansas City won. They're a team, I can tell you that, for sure." While no sources could give an answer more definitive than "probably", all agreed that when someone finds a tape of last nights game, if it was in fact recorded by a professional television crew that regularly covers whichever sport it is those two particular cities typically play, then maybe it can be shown in between the latest development on the Tiger Woods divorce story and actor Paul Rudd's appearance on the Budweiser Hot Seat.