Global Warming Not Real, Says Republican Robot From the Future

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- A U.S. Senate Committee on Environment and Public Works meeting received an unusual interruption Tuesday when a time-traveling Republican robot from the future appeared to warn politicians that the idea of a human-caused global warming is eventually proven to be false and that our country need not take any further preventative measures. The robot, a New United States Senatron from the year 2130, warned of a dystopic future filled with energy efficient transportation and appliances, clean air without pollutants, and hundreds of thousands of new jobs created to enact changes which were ultimately discovered to be completely unnecessary and useless. Begging the committee room to let their constituents know it's once again okay to excessively waste electricity and drive their Hummer SUVs on suburban streets, the Republican robot said it's not too late to avoid a future where Americans are no longer dependent on foreign oil and a visible layer of smog does not hover above most major cities.